Behind every good man, there's a good woman. But behind every plastic, foul mouthed baby, is a straight man. And my straight man is Anna Goldwyn.

Anna has had to endure a lot of crap. She could have brought me up on sexual harrassment charges 850 times by now.

My sidekick, compadre, and drug dealer keeper awayer.

Anna is Garfunkel to my Simon. Rocky to my Bullwinkle. Hall to my Oates! Oh no, wait a minute, she would be Oates. Wait a minute, is he the one with the afro? Does it even matter? They both suck!

Me and my retarded brother Bennie, who has fallen over again.